So there was a nice girl I was trying to make friends with. I invited her over for lunch one day, but it didn't work out for whatever reason. I tried again a few weeks later, but our schedules didn't work out. I might have gone so far as inviting her to a group outing with several other moms, but no show.
I wondered if I should keep trying, you know, to make sure she isn't sitting home in the corner reading a book and wishing she had some friends. Then I started to realize she did have a lot of other friends. And she made it to their appointments and calls. But never mine, nor where they reciprocated.
I admit I was initially hurt and even began to question what I had done. Had someone said something about me? Is it that whole Guess Jeans Syndrome, am I not hip enough? It really consumed me for part of an evening, but I kept it to myself.
I almost forgot about it until I listened to someone else tell me their similar story. It brought me back to the sad feelings I had, but then remembered the times I just didn't feel like hanging out with someone else for whatever reason. It wasn't because of what someone else said or the clothes she wore. We just simply didn't click.
There are people we might want to be friends with, but for whatever reason or no reason at all there isn't a common thread enough to make the effort. I realized it's not a reason to have hurt feelings; it's normal human behavior I think we all participate in.
I am going to continue to do my best at making new friends and being open to hoping there is a click with everyone I meet, however, I will decide to not be hurt if I am the unclickable one with someone. I will decide to understand, smile a genuine smile and say hello when I see her.