two boys and a girl

Sometimes in the middle of the day while I am busy doing 7 things at once I stop and see something that reminds me of where I am at in my life. Today it was catching a little glance at their three dinner drinks on the counter. Three tiny people depend on me each day to get them clean, dressed, fed, entertained, loved, taught, nurtured, and guided through the day. I'm glad I get to do it even though it's hard sometimes and tiring and it seems like the day might be dragging. One day they aren't going to be little anymore and I will miss the tending to; or so I imagine. Tonight I relished the fact that they each wanted and let me sing them to sleep. They each had some one on one time with me as I gave them special attention sweeping hair away from faces and kissing cheeks. Someday there won't be any sippy cups and they won't want anything to do with mom putting them to bed.


This picture of Evan makes me laugh out loud for so many reasons.

A) The lounging around like a prince snacking on olives and being entertained. The Life I tell you!

B) The first time he wore this Happy Camper shirt he went camping with his dad. Every time I put it on him now he asks in a really excited voice 'am I going camping!" Every time I have to disappoint him and tell him no. Sometimes I hesitate choosing the shirt because he gets so happy right when he is about to ask and I hate to burst his bubble. I guess we need to get a shirt that says Happy TV Watcher.

C) Somehow each day he wakes up his bangs keep getting shorter. I have no idea how this happens.

D) Every day he wants to eat a can of black olives. It's now my currency for him. If you say 'dammit' again, Evan, no black olives for you!


augusta georgia late september

I joined the year 1904 and got an ipod. Having such easy access to all my music is like having wings.


At the gym today I stumbled upon Rock the Reception. The station TLC has a show expert choreographers Tabitha D'umo and Napoleon D'umo create outrageous wedding dances that the guests are not expecting during the bride and groom's first dance. I love how it changes the vibe of the boring old wedding routine and also watching the reaction of the guests. I love how concerned and confused they start out and then it turns to excitement and cheering.

Here is one I saw, but it's a home video version. The TLC version of this is way better, but I can't find it.

Mike's brother Nick would have been perfect on this show for his wedding!

And. It's even more awesome watching it while listening to PWEI and pretending they are dancing to cool music.


the pool

When I worked at Little Caesar's there was a large man named Terry. He had a lot of hair on his arms and it was also spilling out of his shirt collars in the front and back. It was thick, black, curly hair. He got in trouble from his manager once for stirring the giant pot of sauce with his arm. I shiver to think of eating a pizza with his arm pubes bubbling inside of it.

So, instead of the mall, we have learned to spend a great deal of time at the local Aquatic Center. This makes the summer a whole lot more fun and tolerable. The only exception to that is Free Day. We accidentally stumbled upon free day and it was like they bused in everyone from the DMV. 10 DMVs, to be exact. It was irrritatingly packed with a lot of people from who knows where to the point that I mistakenly thought we were swimming in sweat instead of water. That's when I saw him. The hairy man. The man that put Terry to shame.
He had more hair covering his body than anything I had ever seen before. I never knew the back of a man could look like a giant, walking bush. His thick, curly hair was so dense that I could not see any skin except on his face. Above his stuble that no doubt must grow back 4.3 minutes after he shaves, poor guy.

Suddenly a public pool just seemed so wrong. Here are my innocent little children happily floating around and accidentally injesting loads of sweaty, pubic hair water smiling all the while. And I stand by allowing this to happen. They should have the super hairy men do a brush down or at the very least wear a body net.

So. I just pretend after free day or hairy man alert they drain the pool, scrub it down, and refill it with clean water just for the sake of the children. And thank goodness hairy people don't become hairy overnight or with the coming of age. You can pretty much spot out the hairy dudes while you are dating. Could you imagine your spouse waking up one morning like a friggin gorilla. Balding I would be able to handle. The reverse would not be okay- I would demand waxing. Our marriage would depend on it.


summer time

I'm not much of a shoe crazy kind of girl. But sometimes I snoop the shoe section and find some gems I love. Remember it's summer in Arizona, it was 115 degrees today. So you have to either be in a pool or in a mall. No other options.

I am liking the look of some of the Gianni Bini sandals. This below is their "Hampton".
I love this one below for a little hot church action paired with a fitted black skirt.

I got these Antonio Melani "Boardwalk" flips and I love them.
This is their "Lexie" if you need a nice flat for the work scene, these would look awesome with a nice pair of Banana Republic Martin style work pants. Or you could bust it out as a Sister Missionary look for church.

These Nurture "Hawkins" are pretty rad -I imagine them with a dark denim skirt or white sundress.

And the Coco Chanel Mademoiselle Eau De Toilette is delicious. It smells so good when I wear it I could just make out with myself.



Look at this amazing idea for father's day napkin folding.
Picture from How About Orange, check it out here for details.

and then you call me

The sunflowers bloomed. And then gave up. And became eerily distorted in shape. Almost bloated and warped. Maybe Dali got his inspiration for melting clocks by watching sunflowers die. If they could make a noise it would be the sound of a record being played backwards.

Today I am listening to Dido. She has an amazing voice. If I could pick a look that would match a voice it would be hers.

I was really sick in December and this song reminds me of how I felt when Mike would visit me in the hospital. Whenever he was with me just for those few hours, those were the only hours of that day I would actually feel okay. Simply just by being with him. I felt like I was home. Although that was a crazy month, when I think back to those moments, well it just makes me blush with love.


somehow this is just how my mind works

So my son thought some Robert Doisneau prints in the bathroom were featuring his late great-grandmother. As I took a close look, the beautiful women in the pictures do look similar to her younger years from photos we showed him.

I asked him where he thought she was. He said he didn't know. I told him I think she is learning about Christ and teaching other people what she learns in The Spirit World.


So I wonder what it will be like when we are on the other side of the veil. We always imagine our ancestors greeting us and celebrating our heritage. The things we learn on earth and gifts we are given come with us, right? So super funny people should still be super funny in the afterlife. So what happens when we see people like John Candy? Will it be like we are all related and hang out? Or will we need to stand in long lines to meet people like that? Will we ask him to do that funny bit again from a certain movie?



I like to wear my husband's running shorts to the gym. It makes me smile. The first time I was so confused at all this extra fabric inside like over stretched underwear. But then I realized it was the built-in penis pouch. It swings like a pendulum between my legs while I run. It makes me miss him. And the things we do. When he's in town. And the lights are dim.

We have this insane clown posse ant farm scattered in our yard. That does not make me smile.


My friend from CA Jen blogged about her goal last summer to do something fun every day. It rocked, check it out here. I had a newborn so I basically spent the summer nursing the baby and putting on movies for my boys. THIS summer I have vowed to do something fun each day. Some days might be going to the pool or a children's museum, while others might be more low key like making cookies, getting ice cream, or building forts. I try to incorporate friends as much as possible to keep the social skills developing for the kids. I am enjoying summer and relishing the extra time (albeit trying at times) I have with Zane out of school to find teaching moments with him during the day and soaking up his laugh right along with the other two.


i wanted to want to be kind

Here's the thing. Mike travels. It sucks. But we have learned to deal with it and pray like an insane amount to know what to do to get him home again with his family every night where he belongs.

Until that happens, it's tough putting 3 kids to bed on my own. But I don't resent him for it. I did in the beginning. But I know he wants to be home helping me.

So there I am at 7:30pm sharp wrestling the baby into jammies while she cries and I sweat. Then I move on to the middle child who I have to chase and pin down; further sweating. The oldest is refusing the turn off video games after 7 warnings and now requires physical removal, gripes and huffs off to his room to refuse the follow 5 steps that are his bed time routine.

Sometimes I have to have to break the routine and take a break from sweating. Tonight I decided it was music night. I collected the musical toy bin and we crowded around my drum set. And we rocked out. Loudly. It was awesome. Every mother needs a decent drum kit. Sylvia was on the maracas. Evan played the floor tom. And Zane was on keyboards. And superbonus: my drumming didn't make Sylvia cry this time!

In other news, Brainbloodvolume was a nice album to run to today. Who knew? Shrink wrap the planet.



Cage The Elephant is an alright band. This song has a catchy tune. But the video is lame.


another conf talk

Yesterday I ended a long, exhausting day with a quick read of a conference talk. I was glad I flipped to this one by Cheryl C. Lant (former Primary General President) after feeling so emotionally drained teaching my children manners, consequences, how to play nice, and eating nutritionally. It was a day where I felt they fought and tested me every step of the way. I don't have many days like that, but man when I do I collapse into the bed at night and think about what I handled well and what I could have handled better for the sake of teaching my kids. I might have even shed a couple of tears telling Mike about the day and how I wished so badly that better choices had been made so it could have been filled with more fun and less time-out management.

As I read her talk I thought about how much my kids need me to continue to teach them about Christ and how to live like Him; be a better example.

I loved the part of her talk that reads:

Now, I would ask you to look around you at those you love. This is what matters most—our families. I am sure that more than anything, you want this family to be yours eternally. The account in 3 Nephi can help us bring our children to Him because it gives us a pattern to follow. First, we must love the Lord with all our hearts, and we must love our children. Second, we must become a worthy example to them by continually seeking the Lord and striving to live the gospel. Third, we must teach our children the gospel and how to live its teachings.

Following this pattern to bring our children to the Savior is a process. Let’s look at the pattern again. First, we must learn how to love the Lord and our families. This takes time, experience, and faith. It requires selfless service. Then, as we are filled with the love of the Lord, we can love. He might weep over what we do, but He loves us and is always there to help us. That is how we must learn to love our children.


I remembered my whole day had been filled with selfless service- that's just the job of being a mom.
I felt comforted when I read how the Lord might weep over what we do, just as I sometimes weep myself over the things my children do. But I love them and will always be here to help them gaining experience and growing faith all the while.


photo by Beka Lowe of Lowe Photography.


Shopping for her first summer sandals made my heart explode.


won't you be my neighbor

It takes moving into a new development, the builder losing their lender, losing the land, waiting until the land is up for auction a year later, getting a new lender, then getting the land back, and returning to the half build house next to us to appreciate the arrival of a port-a-potty. Oh glorious potty, we are delighted to have you as you give shelter to the wonderful men that will be completing the eye sore of a half build home next to my dwelling.
Construction is finally moving again in my little neighborhood of tumbleweeds.

I plan to document each and every little change as they move closer to completing the spec home. Notice in these shots they started one day with removing the boards from the entrances. I broke a bottle of wine on the door frame that day like a ship to set sail. Then they bulldozed away the weeds the following day. Yesterday they placed the beloved potty.

And the funny thing about tumbleweeds I have learned is they look all bad and mighty rolling around with their thorns and whatnot. But when you drive over them, bracing yourself for all sorts of undercar rumblings, they actually crumble into twigs and powder. I found that fascinating.


with my little eye

My two year old LOVES I Spy books. If you haven't seen one, it is basically page after page filled with objects of all sorts of sizes, shapes, and colors. You are given direction to find specific items on the page and it takes a while for your eyes to scan and find these items. But they are always there. Once you spot them, the next time you look at the page the rest of the other items on the page don't seem to matter as much and your eyes know to skip over them and go right to the desired items.
It occured to me as I was listening to conference in April how much life is just like an I Spy book. Our lives are filled with so much noise and nonsense things to spend our time and energy on. But the 'key' or direction given to help guide us and know what to look for in life is here to help us pass up the noise. I find it in scriptures and conference talks. Prayer and personal revelation. Things like that.

Here are just a couple quotes from Thomas S. Monson, The Prophet, from April's conference.


To understand the meaning of death, we must appreciate the purpose of life. The dim light of belief must yield to the noonday sun of revelation, by which we know that we lived before our birth into mortality. In our premortal state, we were doubtless among the sons and daughters of God who shouted for joy because of the opportunity to come to this challenging yet necessary mortal existence.5 We knew that our purpose was to gain a physical body, to overcome trials, and to prove that we would keep the commandments of God. Our Father knew that because of the nature of mortality, we would be tempted, would sin, and would fall short. So that we might have every chance of success, He provided a Savior, who would suffer and die for us. Not only would He atone for our sins, but as a part of that Atonement, He would also overcome the physical death to which we would be subject because of the Fall of Adam.

My counsel for all of us is to look to the lighthouse of the Lord. There is no fog so dense, no night so dark, no gale so strong, no mariner so lost but what its beacon light can rescue. It beckons through the storms of life. The lighthouse of the Lord sends forth signals readily recognized and never failing.