3.25.2009

free on craig's

Just in case you thought you might be missing out on something in the FREE section of Criag's List, I am taking time to check. And let me reassure you, it's a pile of crap. Literally. You can get yourself all the manure you would like for free (see image above).

Hrm. What would any of us do with used tires? Real Simple might want them to make their shoes. Can't think of much else.....

A tree. This tree. Really. BUT you have to dig it out of the ground yourself while I sip ice cold lemonade in my blue chair.

Bucket seats. But we are going to run over them a few more times and put out a few more dozen cigarette butts before you pick them up. Maybe even press a hot iron into the seat a few times to make some nice burn decorative patterns on it.

Drywall. Broken drywall. Because so many people are in need of broken drywall these days. I like to imagine the guy standing there, pacing actually, trying to figure out how to get rid of all the drywall he broke before his boss finds out. Um.....dang......oh I got it Craig's List!
Crutches. What do you do with them when you are done?! Certainly someone else will need them. And maybe it's not urgent enough of a need that you can browse Craig's List for a few days hoping some will become available. Makes sense. Can't really say anything clever about this one. I just really liked how they put them behind these chairs in the picture. I like the thought that he or she sat in that chair waiting for the day he or she could get up and leave the crutches against the wall and walk on their own.
Honeycomb. And I quote directly from the ad "THIS IS NOT ... NOT ... NOT EDIBLE PEOPLE ... IT IS SATURATED WITH BEE KILLER ... YOU MAY NOT BUY THE HONEY ... YOU CAN NOT EAT THE HONEY ... !!!! "
Also, some bees are still alive and remain in the hive. Awesome- I'm coming to get it right now. But can I eat the honey?

A Box. What was this box used for exactly? Was this where the kids had time-out while they were bad? While dad cut them a switch in the back yard and they peeped through the holes and watched in fear? Something about this box screams Silence of the Lambs to me.

And dirt. Just in case you need some, here is some free dirt. So bring your shovel. And leave the tube and fancy fence behind.