1.17.2009

village people


It's amazing to me when I step back to realize how much of the role of mother naturally draws one to give so much of one's self. How easy it is to forget about your own needs and give until you are flat empty only to remember you needed to stop for air along the way, but used your last puff to care for someone or something else.

I just declared to myself that for every month this year I am going to learn something new. I have been feeling very stagnant and dusty in my mind and that's not something I want to develop as an acceptable feeling or way of life. I love learning and although it's not the season in my life to enroll in a college art class or take many drumming lessons, there are a lot of other things I can fit into my life from my list of interests. So, my new thing might be as simple learning how to make sushi better, how to shoot a gun, or how to decorate my living room.

This month I have learned some things already. Beka helped me learn what to do in a fabric store. If I had gone alone, I would have spent hours looking for curtain material in the section designated for woman's clothing. Despite their clearly marked signs.

This month I have already learned the importance of evaluating what I need and how to communicate and arrange for that. In this lesson it's been hard to accept I cannot do it all and that I have resources my husband has lovingly suggested I take advantage of to make my life easier.

After a hard couple of days of not being all I can be like a good army girl, I thought of the things in my life I need help with (even if only temporary) and made a plan with key people and made some calls (along with Mike). I feel more prepared for the final months of my pregnancy, more free to serve others to my fullest extent (which sadly isn't much right now), more prepared to arrange our home for a new little one and most importantly be the kind of mother and wife I want to be.

There is no template for the needs of a typical mother, but it's important to always remember what mine are and for me to do an internal compliance check. A sort of inventory, if you will. We've all heard it takes a village to raise a family, but sometimes it takes a some people from the village to help a mother raise a family.

Some of the things that I found important for me to schedule (when possible) that assist in my replenishment/ peace: date nights, social time, a break during the week with babysitting trades, my mom coming once a week or more during the evening hours, more park days, little moments of learning and self development, and home organization effort. And a lot of baby swiss cheese, cran-apple juice, cherry yogurt, warm dill pickle spears, and creamsicles. Sometimes I share the creamsicles, but only when I get caught eating one.
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