Lucky for Mike, there will be kids at this party. Lucky for Mike, I am not a good planner. Sort of his last minute gal.
OR.
We would be going to the party with me as a Tampon. And I would make him be the period. Which would simply be a shirt with a black dot on it. There's no way he would wear it if it was a red dot. But I know he would still go with me dressed as a tampon. Cos that's just the kind of girl he married. And he would keep it all on the inside and let me do my thing. My tampon dressed mom at a party thing. If I planned well ahead.
You know, I don't know why I don't dress up for Halloween. It's the best excuse to find a ridiculous costume no one else would dare wear and totally rock it. I would rock a tampon. Don't even deny it. Although, it might be a little tricky to discretely nurse a baby in the corner of the room with this get up on. I imagine myself trying to be all smooth about wiggling it up far enough while still trying to keep it on somehow and situating my baby and her food source while holding a conversation with someone. I guess I could always cut out nursing openings in the costume that close up with velcro. Yea, that wouldn't be akward.
OKAY SO MAYBE BEING A TAMPON ISN'T GOING TO WORK OUT THIS YEAR and perhaps I should let it go.