doomsday

I wish I had the energy, time, and resources to start a positive news website. I hate checking CNN every day because it reminds me this world is burning to oblivion and the end is near. Which isn't necessarily the case, awesome things and miracles happen all the time. I want to hear about those, too. The uplifting things that make you smile, not the tragic stuff of people burning in hot air balloons. While that sucks for the dead and their loved ones, and while it's a random twist of events that doesn't happen so often, it doesn't need all the coverage it's getting.

There have to be other stories more amazing to report on. I am sure there was a little baby somewhere who survived a major surgery and recovered in ways that can only be explained as a miracle.

Perhaps there is a Hollywood couple madly in love and celebrating lots of years of marriage with no suspicion of infidelity.

A new family moving into a home built by Habitat for Humanity.

A major medical discovery that will bring hope to a disease that needs a cure.

A child adopted into a loving family.

Teenagers making right decisions and participating in the community.

We really do live in a place where lots of things are going alright and not falling apart. While I am aware it is important to have an awareness of the world around me, especially some of the bad, the negative doesn't need to dominate the headlines every single day.


I know, I need to shut it and just watch Oprah.

But trust me on the sunscreen...

Today as I stood in line w a y longer than I wanted to at Ace Hardware store, I thought of how impatient I have become waiting in lines. It's not so much the actual time that goes by while legitimate transactions need to happen, it's the NONSENSE conversations happening around me. Does that cashier REALLY care about your father's birthday party and why you only feed your dog this brand of dogfood? No. And neither do I, so let's get going.

I just honestly don't think these conversations have any purpose. Friendly? I can smile with the best of them, but it's really not necessary for you to ask me when I am due, what the gender is, and if it's my first. I will probably never see you again as long as I live. Maybe it makes your day go by faster, to make small talk with the people that come through your line. Maybe you are genuinely curious and your mouth opens before you realize it and the things you wonder pop out into conversation. Hey, that happens to me all the time, just with people I might see again. People with whom it makes sense to establish the entry conversation for a potential friendship or meaningful acquaintance.

The truth is, when shopping anywhere I don't feel like talking; or listening to other people who don't know each other talking. I want to get out of the store as fast as I can. Okay, so maybe standing in one spot for a while with an extra 20 (cough) plus pounds for my lower back to support might make the whole experience a little much for my patience sometimes. Do I have this fabulously exciting life waiting for me outside of the grocery store? Not at all. I have a rather dull and routine life, but you better believe I would rather be sitting on the pot or sweeping the freaking floor again instead of hearing another 4 pointless conversations as I wait in line to get back to my mundane existence, which happily excludes florescent lighting. I try to not grit my teeth and to not be so obvious while I imagine my eyes burning holes in the back of your head like I am The Firestarter. I really work hard to prevent myself from getting to the boiling point where I just want to stomp my feet and shout NO ONE CAAAAAAAARES! JUST MOVE ALOOOOOOOOOONG ALREADY!

*

Remember that song Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen) that we all thought came from a great MIT graduation speech? It didn't. It was an essay written by Mary Schmich published in a column of the Chicago Tribune in 1997. She basically indulged in the idea of what her commencement speech would be if she was invited to deliver one. I am often reminding myself of this section of the essay:


"Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard;
live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft."


I am pretty sure I lived in New York too long.
So, how long before Northern California can begin to undo the damage?

things I wish I could make

cos no one else does it the way it should be without over-pricing:



children's bedding- all I want are simple patterns or stripes with some colors that are not obnoxious. navy blue pinstripe sheets with a blue blanket that has an orange (or brown), thick ribbon stripe across the top. Really, it's time I learn how to sew. I could easily pull the room together with this color scheme.

boy's T-shirts- basic colors. how about solids with zero logo. ? why is this so hard? even the little babygap stitched bear is starting to get on my nerves for toddler size clothing.

boy's dressy shoes- brown leather or suede, whatever. just something with decent quality materials that don't look like he is going camping. no, I don't want loafers. I am not hip on the golfer look and we are not part of a yacht club. I can draw exactly what I am looking for, where's my cobbler?

boy's tote bag- this is my first act on frustration due to not finding what I want at a reasonable price. I bought a little beige, cotton tote from Michael's with camo iron-on letters. The letters basically suck and didn't show up (think Cracker Jack Box Tattoo prize). I want to have a re-do on this one and find a cool retro vinyl design to iron on or big nature stamp with brown paint.

boy's socks- can someone tell me where to get the kind of socks the boys we grew up with wore? the socks with the awesome boy stripes that hit mid-calf. I know they are kind of 70's, but I always wished I had a pair growing up.

boy's hair cut- this one gets me every time- can we please have a website or magazine dedicated to different style options for toddler boys that have thin hair? hair club for tots? i have not the slightest clue how to get the boy's hair cut.

I am truly feeling the desire to sit with a designer and create what I want on paper with him or her and then work together to make these things. I just wish I had the talent to execute my specific taste into material items on my own and sell them at prices that make sense for the typical family.

fight fire with fire

My mother called this morning to ask me about the earthquake centered in Oakland.

My response was oh yeah, the earthquake.

Since when did an earthquake become an afterthought in my often-panic-stricken mind?

Mike felt it "rumble and then shake a little". This one was further away than the last we felt. We were also on the top floor and sleeping in bed, so we were distanced from the earth. I think I might have heard something rattle in the kitchen for a moment.

+++

My early morning telephone conversation went on to another topic. My mother informed me lighters are now allowed on airplanes. Awesome. I imagine the moment that was announced all of al-Qaeda gathered immediately for a meeting to put some destructive plans together, laughing all the while at how this changes their current blueprints into 13 less steps while they eagerly work towards blowing us all up in the air.

All I have to say about it is that I am not boarding a plane until I complete courses in Fire Breathing.

While I add lighter and unicycle to my list of things to pack into my carry-on bag.

no really, thank you

When mailing a pile of thank you notes to family and friends for the gracious gifts given for my son's third birthday, it's probably a good idea to pay attention to which stamp each family is getting before sticking them all on.

The Star Wars Collection, for example, has many pretty photos of Luke, Princess Leia, and Queen Amidala. Even Chewbacca is a nice one, might make the family smile and want to watch the movie.

When you get to the bottom of the stack, however, and the last thank you note to mail is for the great grandparents, you are kind of screwed when you only have these two stamps left to choose from.